Democrat strategy session

Democrat leaders have a tiny, tiny problem: 

Dem leader: "Some goofy, crazy, lying, totally non-credible former staffer has charged our nominee with sexual assault years ago.  How do we make the sexual-assault charges against our party's nominee--charges made by a life-long Democrat supporter and former Biden staffer--vanish?"

First staffer:  "We should get our allies in the Mainstream Media to totally ignore the charges, while our other allies in the Media work hard to discredit Tara Reade, and others claim that we simply can't blindly believe all women, even though that's what every single Democrat leader screamed we MUST do when the charges were made against Brett Kavanaugh."

Democrat leader:  "I like it.  I think that's great!"

Female staffer:  "But won't that be a problem?  I mean, for the last 3 years Speaker Pelosi and Senator Schumer and Elizabeth Warren and Cory Booker and Kirsten Gillibrand have said we had to believe all women.  Doesn't this put them in a...difficult place?"

Democrat leader:  "Haha!  Normally it would, but can be sure our media wing won't run any videos of any Democrat saying those things." 

Staffer #3:  "Why not just let Tom Perez replace Joe with Andy Cuomo, on the pretext that a doctor examined Joe and has found a serious brain clot or something, so won't clear him to run for president?"

Democrat leader:  "Actually that's a pretty good idea.  I'll run that by Hilliary and Nancy and see how they feel about that.  But it's definitely believable."

Staffer #4:  "Why not just give the nomination to the guy with the second-most delegates?"

Democrat leader:  "Well that sounds reasonable, and with four more years of conditioning voters to love socialism that will be our plan.  But right now our focus groups show that our base voters prefer an alleged sexual assailant to a socialist.  Unless the assailant is a Republican."