Nike picks a "trans woman" (i.e. man) to advertise its line of womens' sportswear. Everyone raves! Wait...

About the time Anheuser-Busch hired a tranny as the perfect spokesperson for its light beer, sportswear maker Nike decided it needed to get on the bandwagon and hire tranny Dylan Mulvaney as its new "brand ambassador" to sell the company's line of sportswear to women.

But much to Nike's surprise, a few women were less than delighted by the company's choice.

Nike's new transgender "brand ambassador"

If you're trying to sell to women, wouldn't it make a lot more sense to hire a female endorser instead of a male," said one cis-female.

"The best choice in the world would be Riley Gaines," said another woman.  "She tied that ridiculous mental case Will Thomas in the 200 freestyle.  What an incredible performance!  Women all over would be cheering that choice!"
 
Nike execs were baffled by the number of complaints, telling their female customers “Be kind, be inclusive.  You don't want to be like that awful J.K Rowling and be called a TERF, do you?  Of course not.  You should get on board with this very woke campaign.  You do want other women to think you're cool, right?”

But in private some company execs dismissed any concerns: "Our ad agency assured us that women totally support transgender women being used to sell products to other women.  After all, every woke person knows 'transgender women ARE women,' right?

"The ad agency said their extensive focus-group research showed that maybe one percent of women would pitch a fit about our new spokeswoman, and that the complaints would soon stop--because women support other women.  And the president assured Americans that 'Trans women ARE women,' so that should put the matter to rest.

So after a short adjustment, all elite, important women--you know, the ones on the coasts--would support our choice for brand ambassador.  The only ones who might not would be women in flyover country, but most of them can't really afford to buy fashionable sportswear anyway, you know?  So we don't really need them."

As more women began posting on social media that they'd never buy another Nike product, the company used Instagram to respond.  (Nike quit using Twitter after Elon Musk bought that company.  A source in the company said "MSNBC said all the cool people were leaving Twitter, so...)

“You are an essential component of the success of your community!" the company's post began--with the exclamation point. "We welcome everyone who supports diversity.  Be kind. Be inclusive.  We support free speech, but any comments that criticize Diversity, Equity or Inclusion will be deleted.”

White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre said "The president totally supports the choice of this beautiful woman to help sell faaabulous, fashionable sportswear to other women.  Because as he's repeatedly told Americans, trans women ARE women.  So like climate change, or the need to end all use of carbon fuels, the Science is settled."