Q2 GDP released today: dropped 0.9%. By definition, that's a recession. WAIT...Media to the rescue!

As every educated adult American surely knows, for decades the official definition of a "recession" was two consecutive quarters of lower GDP (i.e. economy shrinking instead of growing, as it needs to do to keep up with population growth).

SO...the regime released the GDP numbers for Q2 today, and if you keep up with news (as opposed to the absurd horseshit called "newz") you know the result, right?

Sure: Q2 dropped 0.9%--which is about half the real number.  Seriously, the Atlanta Fed had a "GDP tracker" that showed a contraction of 1.6%.  Eh, what do they know, right?

So since Q1 also showed contraction, then by the long-accepted definition, we're in a recession, right?

Silly American!  You forgot who's running the country:  Democrats and their Media allies.  So the Lying Mainstream Media simply...changes the definition: we are NOT "in a recession."  No no no, citizen!  Instead the Dem-loving, Trump-hating, anti-American Associated Press bleats that "the nation may be approaching a recession."  Or as another Democrat-shill outlet put it, "it may be a recessionary signal." 

Isn't that precious?  See, if the Mainstream Media admitted that the U.S. was in a recession, that might cause Americans to question the wisdom of Democrat policies and edicts--like killing pipelines and drilling permits already issued, and offshore oil and gas leasing, and the biden regime selling oil from our Strategic Petroleum Reserve to China and Europe.

Geez, we can't have that!  Cuz that might make more Americans less willing to vote Dem in November.

Nah, the opinion polls show Democrats actually have a 2 to 4-point LEAD when asked which party they think should control congress.  Seriously.

Hey, happy days are here, comrade!  And to celebrate the great newz about the economic performance under the Dem regime, the Department of Free Stuff is increasing the chocolate ration from 20 grams per week to ten grams, and increasing the vodka allowanc from 750 ml to 500 ml.  

So this November be sure to show your gratitude to the regime by voting Democrat!

And lest you naively think the Democrats and Media re-defining terms to make Dems look better, here are a few other words that Dems and the Mainstream Media have redefined:

"woman"--now re-defined to include men
"vaccine"--now re-defined to include shots that do NOT keep you from getting a disease
"healthcare"--now re-defined to include killing other living things
"domestic terrorism"--now re-defined to mean anything the Democrat party doesn't like
"racist"--now re-defined to mean "white"
"mostly peaceful"--now re-defined to mean no more than 200 dead and five billion in arson and looting
"disinformation"--now re-defined to mean anything the Democrat party doesn't like
"insurrection"--re-defined to include "parading in the Capitol after being invited in by cops
"voter suppression"--re-defined to include having to show a photo-ID to vote or request a main-in ballot

The biden regime has also demanded the banning of the term "illegal alien," since "illegal" calls attention to the fact that the aliens in question violated U.S. law to enter the U.S.  Thus they are here "illegally"--raising the question, doesn't the Constitution direct the president to "faithfully enforce" U.S. laws?  Why yes it does.  So why does the regime continue to allow 200,000 illegals every month to break U.S. immigration law?
   The regime-approved Newspeak is "non-citizen," which hides the fact that they're here illegally, because biden refuses to enforce U.S. law.

"War is Peace."  "Freedom is Slavery."  "Ignorance is Strength."   Wait, my bad: Dems have re-written that to "DIEversity is our greatest strength."

(If you're a young American you may not recognize that the first 3 sayings in the line above were propaganda from the dictatorial socialist regime in Orwell's dark novel "1984.")